rtd

i held the greasy forehead of a seizing junkie
while thinking “you better not die you stupid asshole
i can’t handle that.” and when he came to
and threw up blood on my backpack
and looked up at me, at the other people standing
who had just been doing our best to keep him alive
he growled, swung a fist, fell over and hit his head

mk ultra victim

you remind me of something i enjoy
i scream curse words and explain
i must reschedule my suicide

if i kill myself i will never have to shower
or go to the bathroom or explain myself ever again
i will never feel as scared as i do right now
if i kill myself right now
there is no need to finish this shitty poem

i need a hug
or the shit kicked out of me
either way
i will say thank you
then feel so very lost
when you do not finish what you started